Why conversations?

I asked one of my daughters to look at the final draft of my last post.

With rather too much honesty, she emailed me,

"Also perhaps a little too much use of 'conversation': why not consider substituting 'communication' or 'discussion' in some cases?"

Well, that is not quite all she said, but, for the purposes of this post, all I need to tell you. 

Did I use the word 'conversation' too much? I don't think so. As I explained to her, conversation is what it is all about.

Conversation, true conversation, is not just talking, nor is it telling someone, or being told, what to do. And it isn't simply a means of giving or receiving information - though that is often part of conversation.

It involves trust and respect. For participating in a conversation is to be open to the possibility of being wrong, of having your ideas changed, or of changing someone else's ideas. And so it involves proper interaction: listening, reflecting, responding, asking and answering questions, adjusting your position if necessary. There is a purpose to conversation - and a conversation requires work and, as often as not, preparation.

And it may neither be easy nor comfortable.

A last word from Theodore Zeldin, interviewed* by Matthew Taylor in the last RSA Journal

"There is no genuine conversation when people speak but ignore or misunderstand what others say."

*Tomorrow's Work, RSA Journal Issue 3, 2014

Posted on December 1, 2014 and filed under Miscellaneous.